My Thoughts on “Neon Genesis Evangelion”

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , on September 1, 2008 by mskull01

WARNING:  This blog involves spoilers for “Neon Genesis Evangelion” and “End of Evangelion”.

What the heck have I’ve been up to?!

Not much.  I did get a chance to see Neon Genesis Evangelion which is probably the most popular anime of all time.  A friend of mine, GottaLoveBreath, suggested it to me.  We were talking and I mentioned that I didn’t watch NGE and he’s like, “Why haven’t you seen Neon Genesis Evangelion?!  You HAVE to see it!  You have no choice.  You HAVE to watch it!!  I hate you!  I will eat your children!!  GET OUT OF MY FACE!!!”

Okay, he didn’t really say that, but you get the idea.

So I saw Neon Genesis Evangelion and I liked it.  I like the character Shinji Ikari, I think Rei is cool, I can almost tolerate Asuka and the rest are okay in my book.  The fighting sequences are cool, the English dub was one of the best I’ve ever heard for anime, and it was very enjoyable.  The story, however, was hard to follow at times; I got confused wondering what’s going on and why are they doing that.  The ending wasn’t conclusive but I was happy with it for some unknown reason.  Maybe it was just because I thought Shinji would finally stop being such a gay emo kid.

I do not hate homosexuals or emos or even Shinji, but even I have to admit that Shinji does fit the description of “Gay Emo Kid” well.  When I first heard people calling him that, I was like, “That doesn’t sound nice,” but when I saw the show, I was like, “He seems more emo than gay.”

Think about it:  In a lot of episodes, he’s always putting himself down and saying, “I’m not worthy, my father doesn’t love me, no one really wants me around, they only want me to pilot the Eva, but what happens when I don’t pilot it anymore?  Will they still want me?”

That fits the emo part, but what about the “gay” part?  I think people got that idea from this scene:

One of the episode, he meets the Fifth Child, Kawora Nagisa, who reminds me of Dante from Devil May Cry only more… feminate…

Eva24DC Kaworu.jpg
Wait, that’s a guy?!?

That didn’t really bother me because sometimes Japan makes their male characters feminate (like Sephiroth, a.k.a, the King of Yaoi).

There’s this scene when Shinji and Dante– I mean, Kawora, are in the locker room taking a bath (it’s not what you think!!) and to make a long story short, Kawora turns to Shinji and says, “What I’m trying to say is, I love you.”

That’s scary… especially in a locker room… in the bath…  And Shinji’s just looks at him like, “…uh… that’s cool?”  Really?  That’s just– Wow.  That’s… akward.  Shinji didn’t really say anything to him, all he did was give this dumb look, and then it cuts off to the next scene.

I, however, was dumbfounded and caught offguard with that remark.  That’s no way to make a first impression.

And Shinji says with him overnight with him!!  I kid you not!  No, they didn’t have intercourse; they slept in seperate beds, but would you seriously spend a night with someone you’ve just met and they said that they “love you”?!

At the end of the episode it turns out that he’s the 17th Angel and so Shinji kills him, but he feels bad because he was the only one that ever said that he loved him… which is odd now that I think about it…

So the series ends with some sort of intervention to stop Shinji from being such a bitch and it works and he’s happy and then everyone goes, “Congradulations, congradulations, congradulations, congradulations, congradulations, congradulations, congradulations,” and the Penguin is like, “BWAAAA!!”, and then we’re back with, “congradulations, congradulations, congradulations…”

It didn’t really wrap things up, but it was alright.  Afterwards, I told GottaLoveBreath that I just finished watching NGE and he’s responded, “Wasn’t the ending bad?!”  I replied, “I quite like it actually.”  He returned with, “You should watch ‘End of Evangelion’.  Worst.  Ending.  Ever!!”

So I watched End of Evangelion

Let me tell you something.  I liked Neon Genesis Evangelion.  I thought it was a very good anime.  But the movie in general is an absolute dissapointment.  This movie made me regret ever getting into Neon Genesis Evangelion.  It was more conclusive then the last episode, but the movie was awful!

Camp Rock was bad, but you expect it to be bad.  I didn’t really expect much from the movie because I’ve seen GLB’s review of it on his old account, SOSBrigadeFilms, but I didn’t think it was going to be this bad!

The first half was okay, but the second half was just HORRID!

It starts off right after the last episode and Shinji trying to wake up depressed and self-loathing Asuka.  Meanwhile, troops are going into NERV headquarters and shooting everyone.  There’s blood shooting everywhere and people getting slaughtered and killed left and right and it’s turned to something else.  I almost forgot that I was watching a Evangelion movie.

So Misato–


Not Misao…


MISATO!!

So Misato goes to save Shinji and he’s just sitting there under a staircase all depressed and– wait!  What happened to that intervention at the last episode?!  Did it really take place?  Was it just a dream?  Was it just imaginary like the transitional scenes with the magical girl from Pani Poni Dash?  Why is he emo again?!!  I thought his problem was fixed at the last episode.  Don’t you remember:

“Congradulations, congradulations, congradulations, conglaturation (Angry Video Game Nerd reference), BWAAAA!”

So, that doesn’t have anything to do with the movie?  So the last episode and a half of NGE was imaginary…  huh…

Shinji is found by the soldiers underneath a staircase listening to his mix tape of his favorite songs from the Smiths.  Before the soldiers could kill him, Misato comes to save the day and shoots them both!  Awesome!!!  Let’s see Misao do THAT!!

They get away from the soldiers and to the elevator but Misato gets shot as she closes the door behind her.  She tells Shinji that humans are the 18th Angel and that we can’t live with the other Angels because we couldn’t survive with each other (I think).

Meanwhile, new Eva-models go to Tokyo-3 (or was it Tokyo-2?) and NERV was like, “I don’t think so!  Homie don’t play that!!” so they put angsty-in-the-panties Asuka in her Eva and she just huddles there being twice as emo as Shinji could ever hope for (but he’s trying, he really is).  Then flashbacks happen of Asuka’s mother killing herself and somehow, she found out that her mother was her AT-field the entire time (I don’t know why either) and she goes off fight them new Evas!  YEAH!

THAT’S THE BEST PART OF THE WHOLE MOVIE!!  Asuka beats the everloving crap out of the Evas and it’s probably the best fight scene in the entire series.  And she’s all like, “Mama!  I knew you loved me, Mama!!”.

Meanwhile, Shinji’s all bitchy saying, “I don’t wanna pilot the Eva,” and Misato’s like, “Listen you little punk!  All this time you’ve been whinning and complaining!  Stop it right now, dry them tears and fight like you never fought before.”  Then he’s like, “I can’t,” and she’s like, “You can,” and it goes on and on and on…

Then it get’s bad.

Misato kisses Shinji– I will repeat that– Misato gives a big kiss to Shinji in the lips, and then she puts him in the elevator and says, “I’ll give you more when you come back.”

Okay… How old is Misato?  She is more then likely in her mid or late 20’s.  Shinji is 15 years old.  That sounds like a boy’s fantasy, but in reality that’s sort of… odd… that Misato would kiss a 15 year old boy like that.  I don’t know how things are run in Japan but as an American I am a bit… concerned…

Shinji goes on the elevator still depressed as ever– JESUS CHRIST, MAN, YOU’VE JUST BEEN KISSED BY MISATO, WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT?!?!?!  Then Misato dies from the gun-wound she had eariler.

Shinji goes up to the docking area with his Eva and just sits there doing nothing, but that’s not a problem because I’m sure that Asuka has this under control– Oh, she just died and the new Evas are eating her Eva.  That get’s Shinji upset and so he gets into his Eva and gets ready to kick some ass and chew bubble gum!  And he’s all out of bubble gum!!

But he ends up losing and the Evas take him and makes some sort of devil star to make the 3rd Impact and destroy the world.  Crap!

Where’s Rei, you ask?  She’s dead.  She’s been long dead before the movie.  An alien killed her and took over her body in one of the last episodes.  Gendo wanted to use “Rei” to reincarnate his wife, but “Rei” didn’t and she used her alien powers to go to the 1st Alien’s body and kills everyone.  How?  Their secret desires and wishes arrive to them and then kill them by popping.  I kid you not.  They pop and then they’re dead.

One guy had a Misato kissing him, another guy had a group of naked Reis getting him (creepy) and Maya had Ristuko empraising her and Gendo gets his head eaten by Shiniji’s Eva.

Then stuff happens with Rei coming to Shinji in the star and he gets all crybaby again, but then out of nowhere Sephiroth– I mean, Kawora comes in a Shinji’s all, “YAY!!”  And then the 3rd Impact comes and kills all life and then the rest of the movie turns into that last psychological trip we had before.  Only worse.  There isn’t any “Congradulations” at the end.  It’s just weird and boring and just… I don’t know.

There’s a part where Shinji’s in the room where Misato and her ex-boyfriend are having sex (nothing’s shown!) and it really confuses me.  Why are they showing a kid this?  And he’s like, “What’s this?”  Misato’s voice says, “This is how grown-up express affection (or something like that)” and he’s like, “I’m gonna be doing that?!”  And I’m wondering what the creator was trying to reach to us with these scenes.  Is he trying to enlighten us with a psychological trip?  Is he using the characters as symbolism to reflect our own lives?  I was more concerned about the plot.  Is everyone dead?  Is Shinji dead?  What’s gonna happen to Shinji.  They’ll have to wrap things up at the ending.

But I got this.


The Final Scene of “End of Evangelion”

That’s it?

Nothing else?

Asuka says “How disgusting” and that’s it?!

What really bothered me wasn’t the ending or wasn’t the feeling that I’ve wasted time, but knowning that people actually paid money to see this movie in theathers and this is what they’ve got!!

That was horrible!  The first part was okay, but the rest was just boring and mindnumbing!  I am aware that they’re other Evangelion movies, but I’m just surprise of how bad this one ended!!  How will they go on with this?!!

Okay, may be I’m being a bit of a baby and I’m just whining for no good reason.  The anime was very good and I do recommend watching it.  I probably see the other movies some time, but I just was upset about this.  It could be that I’m more of a slice-of-life comedy type of anime guy, but I found this anime quite enjoyable too.

So if you like gay emo kids, German girls, robots, high schooler, penguins, Tokyo, the end of the world, death, blood, plots that don’t really have that much of a wrap-up, and Robin Williams, then you’ll love Neon Genesis Evangelion.  If not, then you’re better off watching Azumanga Daioh.

I’m gonna be a school teacha…

I’m Madison Skull and I’m not funny.

Seven Words You Can’t Say On Television

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , on June 24, 2008 by mskull01


George Carlin died on Sunday…

He was one of my most favorite comedians of all time. I enjoy how clever and well thought out his jokes were. I loved his material and he was an inspiration to many of the other comedians I love. He was the God of Stand-Up Comedy, which is ironic because he was an atheist.

I enjoyed his vulgarity and profanity and his “flawless logic” and I liked how he was able to make anything funny.

Rest in Peace, George Carlin. Things won’t seem so funny without you.

“I believe you can joke about anything; it all depends on how you construct the joke.”
– George Carlin

I Saw “Camp Rock” on Friday…

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , on June 24, 2008 by mskull01

(NOTE:  I believe that I should make this self-evident.  This review was made for comedic purposes and should not be taken seriously.)

Hi, I’m Madison Skull, and I’m not funny.

On Friday, Disney Channel was on (I have younger siblings) and “Camp Rock”, which was the big up-and-coming original Disney Channel movie was up next.  When I first heard about “Camp Rock” a while back, I wasn’t so enthusiastic as some people were.  I liked the first High School Musical and I didn’t even bother watching High School Musical 2 (songs like “Bet on It” and “Fabulous” repelled me to), but this just didn’t seem interesting.

To me, it seemed like it was just another mediocre, half-assed movie that Disney Channel made in order for them to milk for all it’s worth.  That’s what Disney Channel does; they take something that was good, like High School Musical, and they milk it until it becomes all dried up and disgusting.  Disney Channel makes me sick.

But I decided to watch it for the following reasons:  1) It was either this or spend my time on YouTube and 2) I wanted to at least give it a chance.  Maybe I was wrong.  Maybe I shouldn’t just judge it before I see it.  Maybe it’s even better than I expect it would be.  I can’t say it sucks unless I actually watched it.

So I watched it.  And it sucked.  Everything that I thought it would be turned out correct.

It’s about this girl called Mitchie (Demi Lovato) who wants to go to Camp Rock, where all the stars are made or something like that.  Fortunately, thanks to made-for-tv-movie magic, her mom’s catering business gets hired by Camp Rock so that means that Mitchie can go to Camp Rock but she has to agree to help out in the kitchen.

Mitchie is like the equvalent to Gabriella of High School Muscial, which makes since because Demi Lovato is kind of like Vanessa Hudgens with clothes on.  Plus she smiles just as much.  That’s creepy.

So the whole movie is about Mitchie trying to find out who she is and who she wants to be and all that crap.  In the end, she finds out that she shouldn’t be ashamed and just be herself…

…which is basically the same lesson we learned in the FIRST HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL!  Great job Disney Channel!  You thought us that there really isn’t any reason to be original when banality sells.

Before we go on, let me make this clear:  I’m not a fan of the Jonas Brothers.  I have heard some of their songs which is basically the reason why I’m not a fan in the first place.  I found the guys’ names online in order to do this review because I like to do a bit of research when I’m making fun of someone.  Joe has a nice singing voice, but I can’t stand to hear Nick’s.  I’ve heard dying cats that sounded better than Nick.

 

 

 

Meanwhile Shane Gray, Joe Jonas (the Jonas Brother that apparently CAN sing) is a rebel who has a bad image from the press and is ordered by the record company of his band, “Connect 3″ (The Jonas Brothers), to go back to Camp Rock as an inscructor to fix his attitude problem.

But even I was a bit confused that Nick (the Jonas Brother that CAN’T sing) and Paul Kevin (or Paul or Kevin or whatever the hell his name is) don’t make that much of an appearance in this film.  I thought this film was STARRING the Jonas Brothers, Disney Channel, not just Joe.

So Shane’s like, “I don’t wanna go” and the guys are like, “Oh, you’re going” and he’s like, “Make me”, and they drop him off of Camp Rock and he’s like “Screw you guys!”

Then some girls are chasing him and he runs and trips accidently, but the camera is still filmming it because they hope that it would make the movie at least watchable because in this point, if an anvil fell on him, I would at least think it was decent.  And then he hears Mitchie singing and the playing the piano to the song she wrote.  “This is me, This is me, now I gonna go and pee” or something like that.

Most of the songs in the movie are, “I am me, la la la, look at me, I am me, I’m not you, la la la, love me baby, are you my boy, are you my girl, la la la, I believe in myself, check’s in the mail, I AM ME!”  The lyrics would have been better if they were “Burning just like the match you strike to incinerate the lives of everyone you knew, and what’s the worst you take from every heart you break, and like the blade you stain, will I be holding on tonight?”, or something like that.

Demi is a pretty good singer, but there was this one scene when the head inscructor, which I assume he is… You know what, I’m just calling him the guy with the cool accent.  So Cool Accent Dude is like, “Okay, who wants to come up and sing in front of everyone as I go to the back and snort cocaine off some of krumpets?  No one?  Okay, I’m gonna use my magic finger to pick a volunteer,” and his magical finger points at the protagonist Mitchie, obviously.

Mitchie goes up and sings softly “this is me, yeah yeah…,” and he’s like “*sniff* Could you sing a bit louder? *sniff*” and she pushes out “THIS IS ME, THIS IS ME, ” and this was hilariously bad; it was airy and very poorly sung and she seemed to actually push it instead of sing it.  What ever happen to the pretty good singing Demi?  For some reason, she couldn’t sing in that part, and you can see in the faces of the other bad actors that they couldn’t keep a straight face even when they said, “That was good, Mitchie!”

Camp ROCK doesn’t really seem like a ROCK camp (because it obviously isn’t).  If they wanted a better fitting name, they should have called it “Camp Cheap Stereotypes”.  Through the whole movie, there are these guys who keep on break dancing like idiots.  It wasn’t even thirty minutes into the movie and I thought, “If I see those guys again, I’m going to reach to the TV screen and hurt them.”  The songs were basically pop and hip-hop and soft rock and that’s it.

During the commercials, they had this little segment about the movie.  They had a segment about the same movie that we’re watching.  Is that even needed?!  One of the Jonas Brother (Kevin?) was all like, “Our movie has hip-hop, rock, reggae–” REGGAE?!  WHERE?!  Where in the ENTIRE movie is there a reggae song?!!  Maybe I missed it because I spent most of the time taking Lewis Black’s advice and taking a fork and puncturing my own ear drums!

[Note:  H-A-S-T-A, HASTA!  That song was H-O-R-R-I-B-L-E!]

The closest thing to rock was the Jonas Brothers.  How sad does your movie have to be when the CLOSEST THING TO ROCK IS THE JONAS BROTHERS?!

I did, however, have a favorite part (well I have to, since I’m basically bashing it.)

Caityln (Alyson Stoner, and yes I am getting this information from IMDB.com) starts showing how “good” of a pianist (insert inappropiate penis/pianist joke here) she is.  So she starts “playing” her keyboard with her arms crossed and started making this mess of beeps and boops.  I don’t know if Stoner (she had to be a stoner to even be in this movie) can play the piano, but I wouldn’t know because most of the time the camera is pointed towards the audience nodding and acting like all those beeps and boops are “cool” and “hot” and “bringing sexy back”.  To think that Disney Channel can’t get someone who actually can play the piano, like that one girl who wrote the musical in HIGH SCHOOL FREAKING MUSICAL!!

Then the snob Tess Tyler (Corny Actress) [Note:  I take that back; I do admit that when I watched the movie, the actress did do a good job getting me to really hate this character], who’s the equvalent/knock-off/rip-off/Great Value clone to Sharpay, starts to get jealous of her musical mess because Shane’s there and he’s liking it, and Tess wants to impress popstar Shane.  So she decides, in a fit of jealously, to try to stop Caityln by making herself look like a retard.  She goes, “Snake, Snake!”, but not like Octacon (Snake?  Snake?!  SNAAAAKE!!).

One of the inscructors goes, “It’s a power chord, dumbass” and she’s all “my bad,” and then Shane leaves to go find the Cool Accent Guy and his Cocaine Krumpets.  So instead of forgetting about the interruption and continuing her keyboarding, Caityln storms to Tess and goes, “What the dealeo?”

(You can see at this point that I’m exaggerating their lines, but the set up is the same.)

Caityln rambles on and Tess does the coolest thing that I have ever seen:  she holds up three-fingers on her face making a W, E, M, and then the Loser sign.  She calls it the “What-Ever-Major-Loser” sign.  That’s something posetive that I got from the movie.  I’m probably going to do the WEML sign to my friends; then I won’t have friends anymore.

The script was poorly written and sloppy and there was at least two songs worth hearing.  If you liked High School Musical, then watch High School Musical and sing and dance along to “We’re All in This Together” as much as you want because you won’t feel that much fun listen to the finale song “We Rock,  We Rock, Camp Rock!”.  It’d be better off as “We Suck, We Suck, Camp Cheap Stereotypes!”

I think it was the New York Post or USA Today that something similar:  When Disney finds somethings that works, they keep using it until it doesn’t, and I totally agree with that.  This movie reminded me of why I despise the Disney Channel.

Man, I need my fix…

Yeah, that’s the stuff…

I’ve been Madison Skull, and I’m not funny.

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